4.30.2011

Toddler Golden gloves - tickets sold here.

No seriously..I cannot get out of my own way with this issue!  My son has always been a very easy kid.. nursed for 15 minutes tops then fell right back to sleep.. falls asleep on his own easily.. even when he's sick he's pretty even-keeled. So when I heard stories from friends about their kids hitting them I thought, 'oh my god...they are so patient..I have no idea what I would do if I was in that situation'.

First I should say that I was definitely the type of person, before having my own kid, that saw kids behaving erratically out in public I KNEW that wasn't going to be my child, because I would discipline my children.  I would not let them think that it was OK to act that way. HA! 

OK, so we're back to my kid being nice and even-keeled..  hanging out with kids at school that say, "THAT'S MINE!!" and rip toys out of his hands and he just finds another toy...  So imagine my surprise the first time I try to get him to do something he doesn't want to - put on his PJ's, Oh the horror! - and he swings his hand at me, and yell's, "NO MAMA!"..  What was my reaction the first time this happened?  To tap his hand and say, "No Will!  We do not hit!"...  yup.. I basically hit my kid and then said, we do not hit.  Dummy.  (For all looking to call protective services, I TAPPED his hand but you get the point.)

I realized that my original reaction was not the brightest, so what next?  Next I tried soft, positive reinforcement. "Will, we touch gently.  Hitting is not nice." Then he hit me again, little bugger.  So far I've tried positive reinforcement, angry face and sternly saying, "We do not hit!", Ignoring it, laughing and pretending he means to high five us (I know, ridiculous)..  Ignoring it - that usually turns into him doing it over and over until he gets a reaction, which is usually me losing it and yelling, "ENOUGH!!!"..  What did that lead to?  Him saying "enough mama!!" when he didn't like something.  Sweet.

So this started happening really 2 weeks ago which happens to be a month before he turns 2 AND when his 2 yr molars started coming in. He is still an easy kid but now when he's tired or hungry he's lashing out like this...  I'm sure this is normal but it's driving me crazy!!

So I ask...
 - what have you done that has actually worked in this situation?
 - how many days can you give your 2 yr old motrin in a row for molars coming in and overall bitchy attitude? ;-)

2 comments:

  1. Love the blog!
    I recommend consistent time-outs and/or taking a special items away from him. Find his currency (the thing that MATTERS to him) and take it away. You'll notice a change.
    Also, don't allow yourself to make excuses for his poor behavior just because he's not feeling well, hungry or tired. I say to my kids, "I know you're not feeling well, but you are not allowed to hit/scream..." Then give a time-out.
    Consistency is key. He will still test you - that's the gift of parenting - but he will quickly learn that there are consequences for his behavior. Fun times! Good luck!

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  2. I love your blog too! so great that you write about things we can all relate to! We are going through the same and have done the same things you've done! I also did the tapping to him the first time he hit me and I just started laughing at myself after I did it. As if my 15 month old would know what empathy is! Niko has been hitting for a long time though; it got worse after we brought Emilia home and that was 5 months ago!, and don't know how to stop it; we've tried everything!! the doc told us in the beginning to ignore it; but now that he's older he needs timeouts - we found that timeouts only made it worse and he has been hitting more after we started doing that, although he doesn't hit his sister anymore. All I can think of is that they just have to grow out of it, but in the process they have to learn that the behavior is unacceptable... I keep telling myself "it's just a stage!!"
    If you find something that works you have to post it please!

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